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To Jen:

Hello friend, fellow traveller in this life. You taught me a different way of thinking, to walk a different step, with truth and honesty. Your work gave me an appreciation of energies, I may not always have understood, but I travelled beside you, glimpsing insights. Your directness I admired, your fun, your forthright nature, your truth inspired me. 

I loved when we played, drinking too much wine, laughing, good friends. Beautiful memories shared.

To Bryan, friend always standing firm with your presence, a delightful sense of humour, using music to give joy, singing the prayers of the Peace Space colour work. We send you love and support. We all feel the loss of beautiful Jen, you most of all, will miss your mate, partner, friend, wife. 

In sadness,

Bronwyn 

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Thank you, Nurse Jen, for the Light and the Peace you have Gifted.

Your legacy for us is that knowing of a safe home, inspiring confidence in our creations.

Springboard.

Peter, Anne, Aren and dragon Lila

“ I have been everywhere with my son, absolutely everywhere, doctors paediatricians, naturopaths, and we do these exercises…. kinesiology I think…crawling around and some thing called re-patterning, re-imprinting the body in a pre-crawl stage….but you’re the only one who seems to understand…you’re the only one where he seems comfortable…and how is it that you can both see colours emanating from your fingers…what even is that?… and I don’t have much money because I have had to give away everything just to parent this child…but I just want to know what it is that you do and I’m wondering if I can come once a week (gulp)… pay you what I have in my wallet on the day just so I can understand…just so I can parent this kid…I don’t know what else to do.”

“… they… THEY … who are they (she mumbles)… I can’t explain that now… they are telling me to make myself available to you day and night 24/7…whenever you might need to speak to me …here is my number… oh and I don’t want any money”I go home, baffled, relieved…but what is all of this about…I don’t understand… and this mandala… I have to colour it in…but I don’t understand… is it like a magic eye thing…should I just stare at it… to see what might come to the surface…yes …that sounds like a plan….

Three days later my grandmother dies and I have an out of body experience… there are multiple Me’s… one curled up exhausted on the bed, post funeral…the other hovering over Me….looking down… pitifully… the other Me is in the mirror all dressed up corporate style and the final Me is looking at the Me in the mirror viewing the life I forecast will be ahead …but the corporate clothes on the Me in the mirror begin to appear all saggy and baggy and this me in the mirror is all hollow and grey Me’s, and then I hear this voice in my head say, ” This is what your son experiences he is….in and out of his body…and you must understand how it is for him, can’t you be compassionate?”

I realise I need to stop my bitching about how hard it is to parent this kid, about how much I am sacrificing and realise that and if I am to be responsible….. a responsible parent…. in anyway shape or form that …corporate life is not important …it is not the way… it is shallow and grey…I am terrified by this experience… I am exhausted, sad at the loss of my grandmother and needing to sleep but too scared …what if the Me’s return?…. After much deliberation I call this Jen woman. She tells me she will ‘shut me down’ and to come see her in 3 days time.

Within minutes I experience what I can only describe as the lights being turned off…the power plug pulled… what is this …. The voice tells me “just sleep, rest now and all will be explained.”

 

…and so my journey with Jen begins… I meet with her solo and also once a week in group…Monday morning Earth healing… I meet Neri, Susannah, Bryan and a few others along the way… how lush.

…at some stage in my learning they ask me to take on the role of facilitating workshops on behalf of Jen…I don’t want to do it… but I know I must…

Each workshop I present is another layer of learning…Jen is there all the while, every step of the way, telling me she is backing me, supporting me, in behind me, in front of me and beside me… and, at times, putting me back together…when the warrior in me had travelled to far… when the warrior in me was not peaceful.

Jen was my mentor, my colleague, my confidant and my friend … I thank her for the lessons, for the privilege, for her patience and for her honesty…

…I will be forever grateful for the learning shared and the graciousness of your intent…

 

Much love and light to you as you journey on….

A poem for a dear friend….. I never really said goodbye
I had the chance and I let it slide
I guess I shut it out, pretended it wasn’t true….
but my friend Jen, I have a few things I would like to say to you. Thankyou for everything you have done
Thankyou for supporting me when times weren’t so fun,
especially as a child you were so key and without you
I can’t imagine who I would be,
it doesn’t seem fair on you to have this happen
Considering your retirement, your last legs your resting…
So rest now and listen to the Angel harps playing,
Feel the warmth flow over you like the Sun Rays on a warm day,
Kick back wherever you are and laugh at the memories,
I remember all the times you helped me,
Your funny tasting potions your big wall of jewellery,
I remember playing Zoro in your backyard and with your sons it was blackjack and poker,
I remember so much and nothing bad, how interesting but yet how sad.
I feel for your family I hope their doing okay
Just know that time will take the pain away.
I’m sorry for your loss, please know that.
Jen, this is my goodbye, that one hug, that one look in the eye or one sentence could have sent,
I wish I did at least one of these things… but this will have to do…I got in too late…

(Thankyou so much for the scissors).

Rest in peace, Jen
With lots of love, Joel xo

My good friend, teacher, mentor and healer passed on Thursday the 07.05.2015 at 1.45am. Best friend to so many with an integrity and generosity of spirit rarely seen, she will be sorely missed.

Jen completed an immense body of work, always working in community and inviting the contributions of others. While the Peace Space Community will carry her work forward, I’m sure Jen will light the way as torch bearer into the new world.

Peaceful travels, sister.

“Two Shoes”

In the early days of Peace Space Jen & I decided to give the interior walls of the workroom a fresh coat of paint. There we were , the room full of drop sheets,  furniture all pulled out, sugar soup,  sponges, buckets , paint tins,  rollers ladders etc.etc.etc. and so the painting had begun…

Up an down ladders,  busy! busy!

It came lunch time and I said I’d go get us something to eat…coming down the ladder I called to Jen to ‘pass me my two shoes.’

Jen saying ‘Your what?’

I said ‘my two shoes, please’

‘Ok, Two Shoes, there’s your ‘two shoes’…

But this time we were both laughing at my calling for ” two shoes!”

I became for a little while, known to Jen as “two shoes”…Then on my birthday Jen gave me the gift of an Animal Wisdom book and written inside was..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TWO SHOES,

WHEN COMING DOWN THE MOUNTAIN MAY YOU HAVE CONFIDENCE AND GOOD COMPANY.

I’LL WALK WITH YOU, Love Jen.

And still today I know and feel Jen is walking with me.

~~~○○○~~~

With gratitude and love always to a very special friend <3

Neri

I first met Jen 10 years ago and have loved and respected her ever since. Her light and wisdom made the world a better place. I’ve learnt so much from her, I will be forever grateful for the gifts she gave to me of her time and knowledge.

Blessings be upon you Jen, I hope we can meet again someday and talk about fantastical things!

Until then, in loving kindness, Ivy.

My tribute to Jen the ‘Googy’

When I awoke on Monday mourning,
I wasn’t aware of Jen’s passing
Now I want to say ‘Death’ but I hear Jen say,
Have I taught you nothing?
You know better than to call ‘it ’death, and to use your words less harshly.
I woke up with a ‘poem’ in my head and having recently heard a friend quote
Clancy of the Overflow
Assumed that the poem was ‘there’ because of that
Although at the time I didn’t really know
I went to work and as soon as my meeting of the mourning was concluded
Went into an office and wrote like I was deluded,
And in about seven minutes had the words completed.
So I wrote below,
Thinking all the while about Clancy and the Overflow:

Abbey said she’s kinda sorry, but rushed of in a hurry
Didn’t want to create any worry, her mind was in a flurry
Tired she said she came to thinking, of others’ issues as merely ‘whinging’
And it came to her as wishing, for a life of peace and calm and fishing. 
Though I expect she felt restrictions, so took an offer on better terms, pay and conditions
She said that if you had reflections, she would respond by email if you sent them
Although I think she was expecting, that would happen when she had internet reception
And thought it likely in the interim, you would find the answers by then.
And she wanted us reminded, that no one else can really find them
All the answers we are mining in the mire, are right in front of us most of the time
While she thought that if you were needing, it was easy to find a shoulder on which for leaning
But she really felt it was time for cleaning, out her mind.
I think she said it would all get sorted, but wanted to guard her aura
And I think she felt her role was just becoming harder
And she was starting to feel somewhat shabby
Coz she said at the time of her departure, to send her love and all, Abbey xxx.

And there it was, so I quickly typed it up and emailed it to myself
Thinking at the time it felt a bit unusual
For I am not one to sit around and write and pen
Little did I know that a short time later I would feel that it came from Jen.
Later that evening, when I read about the passing of Jen it came as a shock.
I didn’t know who to call however luckily I still had the number of Jen’s dear friend, Neri
I called Neri and felt blunt when I explained it was Kerry
Neri quickly told me that Jen’s funeral was the next day at the Loch.
I felt it was meant to be that I had learned
I didn’t cry that night but felt very concerned
And had a very teary awakening the next day
As I got organised to make the journey for my beloved Jen
And that’s when I realised I must take along the ‘poem’ that I felt so compelled to pen.
I was struggling to keep it together to make the trip and through my tears felt Jen’s presence as we engaged in our ‘silent conversation’ with our usual humour, gentle teasing and banter.I met Jen about a dozen years ago, or maybe it is a baker’s dozen or a millennium because I hear Jen say such things don’t really matter on the time and space continuum.
I went to see Jen upon the recommendation of a friend and having had an interesting life was still carrying significant trauma, grief and stress.

Jen became a support, a guide, a mentor and a cherished friend over those years. As I would go and see her, or call her when I felt the need and occasionally when we made time we would just get together for coffee.

I called Jen’ the Googy’ both directly to her and to others. This word came from my great nephew. For when he was a small child it was the word he used to refer to anything which seemed weird, strange or haunting.

And Jen became affectionately known as the Googy
To me, family and friends and Jen laughed at the loving taunting
Jen said to me over the years the words to describe her were many
But she had never been called ‘a Googy’ as labelled by my great nephew Beni.

Jen was very much a ‘Dear Abbey’ in my eyes and the eyes of others
I took many ‘friends’ to see her over those years
And whether they ‘believed’, listened
Understood, or didn’t
They all reported back one very undeniable fact
Seeing Jen always made them feel better.

So as I drove to Jen’s funeral I was asking her why I didn’t know sooner that she was going to pass
Jen’s words came through loud and clear that I needed a ‘wake up call’ and a kick up the arse!
Some years ago Jen told me, amongst many things
That she saw me at about aged 48
And today I have turned 49
Sitting, looking quite thin
And doing what I wanted, which was to write
And I hear her say don’t weight
(Mmmm haven’t quite mastered the ‘thin’ bit yet either!).

Over the past days I have felt a combination of many things,
Grief, sadness anger and loss
And this mourning as I sat in the sun feeling sorry for myself
I kept saying to Jen
Well who am I going to ‘whinge’ to now?
And the answer came through loud and clear
Almost deafening to my ears
Jen said, ‘well you are not – it’s plain and simple just stop!!!’           

I have learnt so much from knowing Jen. I will continue to know her and love her as she will continue to know us and so much more. I am looking forward to finding her “over there’ when the time is right. In the meanwhile, I will try and live my life remembering her amazing kindness, generosity and insight. I know that without meeting Jen my life would not be the same.

Love you long time and thank you for everything and then some!

Kerry xxx

So many lessons, so much imparted. Not just knowledge, but more than that – Jen, you have shown me, reminded me, over and over, patiently and sometimes not so much (sorry about that! I’m so glad you laughed heartily each time I apologised for making you say it to my unwilling but striving-to-be-better Self!), that a big part of what you’ve taught me is simply to get back to my own innate knowing with which I had lost touch.

I woke up and wised up so gently when I came to Peace Space. The colours and shapes I had always seen behind my eyes as a child and into early adulthood that I had been passively observing were given sense and meaning. Peace Space was truly unlike anywhere I had ever experienced – because I was allowed (encouraged!) to be myself, “warts and all”, and in order to honestly discover who that was, I had to wade into and brave those colours. Now, I can use them with purpose when I am called in to service.

I’m not the only one who’s called on you for help who would consider you their life saver. But save it, you did. And I give you my deepest gratitude for helping my way feel more bearable, more liveable, more enjoyable, more balanced. When my daughter died, it was just about more than I could bear. My husband acknowledges you personally as the one enduring friend and confidante who willingly braved that harshest of bitter times with me. And not only that, encouraged me to spin my leaden “lot in life” into alchemical bounty – I was put to energetic work blessedly early, walking alongside others who had lost children, I felt I had this little secret inside me that I needed to try and share with them because I knew if I could have it, and I felt no more special than any other, then they certainly could find it too. That easy, grace-filled place of peace.

You have laughed and word-danced me through worlds and helped me to be unafraid of my gift, you have lifted me from deep depressions several times, you have implored me to keep stepping and having faith – without your hand to hold, I may have screeched into some sort of other undesirable oblivion and not had the staying power to ground and birth my second surviving child.

It has been one of my life’s greatest joys to share her with you. And one of my most profound blessings, that you helped me interpret her sensitive and attuned ways. What a gift you have enabled me to give to my child: to help her remain open, whilst balancing this Knowing with that thing called “living life” and “being a kid”! Her buoyancy is testament to our fast learning how to guide her, with all thanks to you and the Peace Space work for helping me stay open and grounded.

Jen, even your passing has been a most treasured experience. I will forever cherish days spent studying at Elpho, countless hours each week on the phone over the years as you methodically and willingly imparted the ongoing workings of Peace Space, and more recently the profound and deeply cherished “last times” holding a space as one of your pillars – and there was so much laughter still to be had in between!

I told you I have heard every word you have ever said and I do still firmly know this to be true. They are all catalogued and filed away! And I will draw on those words and anecdotes as required.

But most profound, amongst all my experiences of loss and bereavements and estrangements when I’ve been typically held (or been inflicted upon by another) with so much pain, regret, torment, angst, anger, guilt… this time, with your passing, none of that has been present. You were still gracefully teaching as you went! No, I’m not happy one little iota about this Universe’s plan, for you or for any of us in having to say goodbye… but I do understand it, and I appreciate that even in this, there is great beauty to be found and experienced.

Whilst still a very sad and huge loss, then, the difference is palpable. I’ve been SO surprised by that. As we both nodded in agreement during these recent months, all that needed to be said to each other has been said. I could not have known then in those shared moments what a thing of true beauty that would turn out to be. What an eye-opener it has been, that this is how seemingly unstoppable separations (whether by death or estrangement or distance) could be. So you have gone physically from my life but with nothing to be reiterated or hashed out between us, I am left with absolutely no regrets, no guilt, no listing feeling. And each time I go into a space of “But… what is this steadiness I feel?! My love for her is so great, and I will surely miss her deeply, but how can it not be that I’m not lost or wretched?”, a flood of remembrance comes rushing in and washes away the beginnings of those old, familiar tapes: there is another way. We can grow beyond the pain. We have all we need in us. And I do not have to go to the crashing depths to prove my unending love and gratitude. In fact, you would have willed me not to, had you been here to tell me so yourself!

What blessings you have not only given but taught me how to graciously receive. Wow. What a Soul you have been to meet and know. In some ways, I feel like I am only just beginning to really know all that you held for the many you were in service to while you stopped here.

Wherever you go now, and however we may meet again, I know I will recognise you. How lucky we all have been to weave you into our awareness, for, certainly, there are many of us who will meet you once more.

In great love and reverence, my dearest sister/friend.

I first met Jen at Mind Body Health in Moonee Ponds in 1998 and it so happened because my masseur went overseas and I asked Dr Anne to recommend someone for me to see. Jen was hardly a masseur but she immediately captivated my interest and I began a long and lasting relationship with her. At that first appointment she told me that my sister who had recently died was waiting to “pass over” and of course I was thinking, “How did she even know about my sister”?I have kept notes of every consultation I have had with Jen and have been pondering about how to say what she has done for me as both a teacher and a friend because I can’t separate the two. I think the most important thing would have to be that she taught me my own worthiness and that my life was not dull and unimportant and to live in the “cyclic brilliance” of each moment. The other most important thing was about having fun and the times I took my violin to Peace Space and played with Bryan and shared the music plus the odd glass or two of wine.Thankyou, Jen. I have all of your work and use it daily as I edge closer to the “cyclic brilliance” of each moment. You will never be forgotten.With love and gratitude,

Margaret Anderson